Congratulations, you are some kind of special that a close friend or family member wants you to be in their inner circle of witnesses on their big day. Soak in the moment, celebrate, have fun, but please know this is a serious on-taking with real responsibilities.
Congratulations, you are some kind of special that a close friend or family member wants you to be in their inner circle of witnesses on their big day. Soak in the moment, celebrate, have fun, but please know this is a serious on-taking with real responsibilities.
Unfortunately most people, to no fault of theirs being first time bridal attendants (because that's essentially your job, to attend to the couple) don't understand that with saying yes comes more than just walking down the aisle and posing for pictures.
Usually once you agree to be apart, a conversation will be had. Your party decides on what kind of attire you will wear, what shoes, and accessories look best. What makeup style are you going for, and which hairstyle looks best on everyone. Please understand that there is a significant cost that comes with being a bridal attendant. The bride and groom are not responsible for the cost of your outfit. Some couples are extraordinarily gracious to pay, but this is very rare. Be prepared to save your money!
But aside from how you look on the big day. Your job is much more involved. It is your job to help make the bride and grooms experience on and leading up to the big day as smooth and easy as possible. That means if you’re needed to go dress scouting, make yourself available. If the couple needs you to go check out a hot band, make yourself available. If there's a cake/food tasting and they need extra help deciding, if they need help making a registry, shoe shopping, mother of the bride dress shopping, flower shopping, post office runs, invitation assembly line, envelope stuffing, stamp licking, make yourself available!
You also have the auspicious honor of planning the bridal shower. While it is not mandatory for the bridal party to pay for the shower, it is customary for the bridal party to be very hands on. Make sure they have all the decorations, food, and anything the host needs to make the shower fabulous. You can also plan a pre-wedding bachelor/ette trip. Keep in mind that you will need to plan well in advance to allow everyone to budget accordingly.
Now for the big day... Remember this is their day, and not yours. I remember some years ago I was asked to be a bridesmaid. I took my job very seriously. I did my research about what I should have on hand, I went out and bought oil blotting tissues, Band-Aids, a little sewing kit, a small deodorant, and put all this together in a little pouch with some lip gloss. The morning of I was taken aback on the other bridesmaids disregard for the bride. They put so much time into getting themselves ready that it was just I and another girl that helped the bride get ready. Throughout the day I saw people touch up their makeup but no one ran to make sure the bride's lips weren't chapped and dry (which happens because of all the kissing and smiling) so again I had to come to her rescue.
Don't be that girl/guy! If you agreed to be a bridal attendant, your job is to tend to the couple. Make sure the bride's dress is fluffed out for all of the pictures; her makeup should be on point at all times. The grooms lapels should never be turned or sticking up, and if his lips are chapped have some chapstick, or buy one and give it to him to put in his pocket for the day. They will be taking pictures all day, help them look their best.
Oh, and It is also your job to make sure grandma gets to the bathroom ok, if there is no other family member to do so. As well as getting the party started and keeping the guest on the dance floor. There’s nothing worse than a dry reception. The bridal party should be the first ones on the dance floor, keep the party going!
Worry about what they worry about so they don't have to worry. If you follow that mantra, you're shaping up to be a great attendant and you will be the MVP in their book.
Stay Beautiful!
